But I Don't Wanna Go!

Emilee decided last minute not to have the kid. At least that is what she was telling me at about 2:30 PM on Sunday. She decided that Anna Grace was just fine where she was and there was no good reason for Emilee to go to the hospital "just to have her rip me a new one". It took a little convincing but Emilee decided to call the hospital to make sure her room was ready. When she received the answer, "we are all ready for you", she went pale. "I guess we have to go, they are waiting for me".

So we headed out for the journey that awaited us. Well the journey that Emilee was about to start. I just get to sit and watch and offer an encouraging word or two; all while dodging flying objects! So we loaded the car and headed to North Fulton. Of course we figure out half way to the hospital that we forgot pretty much all of my stuff. Good thing this was planned, I might have forgotten to bring Emilee with me if this had happened spontaneously!

We get to the hospital around 4:15 PM and are told to "go ahead and pick your room." What great service, we get to pick our room! I am thinking that obviously my fame has preceded us and they know we are to be treated like MVP's. That lasted about 30 seconds, just long enough for the nurse to advise us that we are the only ones in the whole section. WOW! They cleared it out just for us, talk about star treatment. Brittany Spears would have been envious.

The nurse (Tracy) informs us that she has to go to the pharmacy to get the Cervadil. No idea if I spelled it right, I just went phonetically. So she returns a few minutes later and pulls a shoestring out from a box. It really did look like a shoestring. She then informs us that she will be placing this behind Em's cervix. This is so the cervix can "ripen", and start to move into position to deliver the baby. Emilee gets into position and Tracy starts to place the "shoestring" by basically putting her entire arm into Emilee. I was reminded of the line from Fletch..."Using the whole fist Doc?"

As Emilee tried to keep her eyeballs from bulging out of their sockets Tracy worked diligently to place the medicine. Afterwards Emilee confided in me that she was pretty sure that Tracy was trying to place the string somewhere closer to her throat, but Tracy finally seemed happy with where the string had been placed. Then out of nowhere the contractions began. At 9:45 PM they were 5 minutes apart and about 45 to 60 seconds on duration. Now we (royal we here) settled in for the long night.

We got a little sleep! About 3 hours, and then the contractions really started to kick in. Emilee described the pain simply as " a huge knife that your daughter is jamming into my back and twisting. Oh, and imagine the worst cramps you have ever felt sucking that knife ever deeper into my back and into my thighs." So Emilee started the fun part with out me!

Around 3:45 AM Emilee announced that we would not be having other children, as she was pretty sure that "all of this" was not worth it. So Emilee had been in labor for about 8 hours at this point and was already calling to plan my vasectomy. But that all changed shortly, the nurse informed her that she could have a little relief; Fentanyl.

Fentanyl is a drug related to morphine, and it worked. Emilee got all glassy eyed and was able to get some relief and a few little naps between contractions. That left me alone to think for a few minutes, and we all know how dangerous that can be when I am left unsupervised. I did not get too deep into my subconscious though. I left the thoughts to helping and supporting Emilee over the next many hours. That and how I was going to exact my revenge on the sadist that designed the "reclining chair/bed".

I have no idea who designed this thing, but they never sat in it after they did. I am also pretty sure that this person was the offspring of The Marque' de Sade and the bastard that designed the first sofa bed. If I ever have the need to torture or extract information out of anyone I am getting one of these for the purpose. But again, my discomfort paled greatly in comparison to that of my wife. She was suffering, but she wanted to do so quietly so she would not bug the nurses! I would have been hitting the call button non-stop. She took it all like a champ.

At around 6:00 AM the nurse came in and removed the Cervadil and started the Pitocin. That's when the "fun" really started. Pitocin speeds up, strengthens, and lengthens the contractions. It is also the drug that made me feel the most useless. There is my wife, who I been able to fix in the past, in a miserable state every two minutes for 30-45 seconds at a time. All I can do is watch. Nothing I do helps. Makes you feel pretty worthless. AND, she'll always be able to pull the "I was in labor with your child for 72 hours" card.

I get to watch this for another three hours until Dr. Seigel shows up to give us an update. Now Emilee is at 5 cm and Doctor is ready to break the water. So he takes a Q-Tip that is about six feet long and places it in to break the amniotic sac. The water breaks clear and free of meconium, and all is good in the world. And then the contractions kick in even worse! Now Em is in pure panic mode.

Then the savior in scrubs shows up. That's right, the anesthesiologist. I am pretty sure that as I write this she is thinking of naming our son after him if we ever have a son. Emilee went from tired, scared, and hurting to smiling, restful, and ready to take on the world. I don't think she would feel that way if she saw the needle that he jammed into her back. A quick reference is a tee-ball bat with a sharp point on it. And then he filed something that looked like dental floss and pumped some medicine through. Emilee thought the skies had parted and the world was full of rainbows.

At 12:30 PM Emilee was dilated at 10 cm and the RN could feel the top of the head outside of the cervix. She was now ready to have a baby....


Stay Safe,

Rob