It's Not A Five Dollar Footlong

We turned nineteen weeks yesterday (Thursday), and Emilee tells me that the baby is now the size of a Subway six inch sub. I thought that was a pretty cool reference. I mean we have been talking about having a hamburger and now we can diversify a bit. I think I will have the combo. Then I get the damn $5 foot long jingle stuck in my head. I hate that jingle. It is so simple and you hear it everywhere. It also made me think of when our kid will be a foot long and how much I wish it was only going to cost me five dollars.

For those of you that have had children in the last few years, this question is a simple one for you. Does anyone know how much strollers cost? I do! For the "travel" system, we are looking at shelling out $300! And I thought the kid was going to PREVENT us from traveling. Then Emilee had to rain on my parade and tell me that the stroller did not come with frequent flier miles. It is called a "travel" system because it allows you to travel with your child to fun and exciting places like the diaper aisle. But of course there is more to be concerned with.

Emilee has been researching everything having to do with the baby and its logistical needs. I am glad she is doing it because if it were me everything would be stainless steel. It's easy to clean and always looks good. But she has actually fretted over every detail from safety to colors to fit. I need to explain fit. It has nothing to do with the backseat of the car or how well it folds down to fit in the back of the car. It has to fit in the right spot on the grocery cart!

Yes you read the last part of that right. We spent 30 minutes in Babies R Us looking at different seats and "travel" systems to see how the seat part of the operation fits in the child seat of the shopping cart. Who knew that his was a pass/fail criteria for a stroller seat? I feel cheated. I am pretty sure my mom just sat me in the buggy and propped me up with some of the groceries. Maybe that is where my love for Charmin started. We bonded as it protected me! Anyway, do you know what we decided on? Neither do I. I just hope we pick one out soon.

What is funny, to me anyway, about much of this is that she will scrutinize one thing for weeks before NOT being able to make a decision. Then when asked about something else on the never ending list of stuff we have to buy she just makes a snap judgment. I asked her about the vibro chair or whatever it is called and got look #34 (I don't have to justify it) as she informed me that it just looked the cutest. And here I was thinking that it had to fit somewhere. I get so confused.

I have also learned that you can't just take the car seat in and out of every car. No, No, No. You have to buy bases so that they can be more secure. These things are about $50 a pop and they are just PVC. It's Plastic! $50 for a molded piece of plastic!!!!! I just picture the inventor of this thing laughing his ass off about this one. "We sell plastic seat with straps to Americans. They never figure out it cost $2.50 to make." (Taiwanese accent by the way). They really saw us coming on this one. What happened to the back of your mom or dad's hand to stop you from being ejected anyway? I made it out alive.

I know that I am being ridiculous here. Everyone wants their children to be as safe as possible. I would feel horrible if something happened to little Quineshia. I just wish it weren't such an obvious racket. I keep looking for Pauli Walnuts to come out of the back of these baby stores. I would probably feel LESS abused if it was the mob behind all of it. At least I could go in and play my numbers while I was making sure the seat fit in the right part of the shopping cart.

Stay Safe,

Rob